This trailer really takes the name "teaser" to heart because it's so damn uninformative that the Star Trek corner of the internet is already self-cannibalising. WHAT IS HAPPENING? NOBODY KNOWS, BUT EVERYONE'S CAPSLOCK KEY SEEMS TO BE STUCK ANYWAY. To be honest, it would still inspire this type of reaction even if it was just a couple of shots of the Enterprise flying around and Kirk flossing his teeth. Unfortunately, we can't even analyse the style of the trailer for ~hidden meaning~ because it's clearly just following the same formula as the recent Avengers, Dark Knight Rises and Iron Man 3 trailers: vaguely apocalyptic danger, with the villain providing an ominous monologue in the background. The biggest question right now is Who Is Benedict Cumberbatch? There were already three popular theories knocking around -- Gary Mitchell, Sybok, and Khan -- but I think that all three can still be backed up by things we see in the trailer.

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Gary Mitchell and Dr Elizabeth Dehner. |
Sybok doesn't have much going for him aside from the fact that Cumberbatch's voiceover is revenge-themed, and the film's subtitle is "Star Trek: Vengeance" in Russia. As a Vulcan he might well have reason to be angry at Starfleet for failing to save his home planet, which fits in with some things Cumberbatch has said about his character being more morally ambiguous than outright evil. However, I feel like "morally ambiguous outcast half-brother attacks earth" is really too similar to the Avengers plot to be a viable option in a major blockbuster only one year later? Particularly since they've hired another posh English actor with dyed-black hair to play the villain. There's also the detail that Cumberbatch doesn't have Vulcan features, but that doesn't necessarily negate him being a Vulcan since there are several instances in Star Trek canon where characters have plastic surgery to look like a different species.


Misc. thoughts:
- "Star Trek Into Darkness" is still a terrible title.
- I've already seen a couple of people saying things like "I find that blonde girl annoying already". CUT THAT OUT. If you hate the new blonde girl based on 3 seconds of trailer footage, then I don't know how to put this any simpler: you're being a sexist idiot.
- If you're going to get annoyed by anything, get annoyed about the fact that the two women in the trailer spend half their screentime screaming or crying while the men do action stuff. I have no doubt whatsoever that Uhura will be awesome in the movie, but I'm not hugely impressed that the trailer-editors decided to devote half of her miniscule screentime to crying into Scotty's shoulder. If anything, someone should be crying into her shoulder. Maybe Chekov.
- I've also seen people on Tumblr getting excited over "how good Benedict Cumberbatch's American accent is". I'm sorry, what? He's speaking in his normal voice.
- I do kinda like the brown/black leather outfits worn by Uhura et al, but sci-fi movies realllly need to retire the whole "badass/villain = long black leather coat" thing because long black leather coats are dorky as hell. The only way I can really legitemise them in this instance is if everyone's on a lava planet, because leather is relatively fire-proof.
- That red planet is super cool -- does anyone have any idea what it could be?
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