Dolce and Gabbana, Fall 2013.

Entirely by accident, this season's Dolce & Gabbana turned out to be incredibly topical. Inspired by the Vatican and showing at Fashion Week just after the news broke about the Pope's retirement, this collection was guaranteed to appear prominently on the pages of every fashion magazine in the known universe. The only thing better than tall thin ladies wearing sparkly clothes is tall thin ladies wearing sparkly clothes in a newsworthy context. For this reason, I'm going to take a few moments to consider the implications of our briefly Popeless world. NEWS.

photos from Style.com

You know in movies when there's a retired cop (probably played by Bruce Willis) who is brought back for One Last Job? Well, I'm kinda wondering if it's the same with popes. Like, if in the next couple of weeks there's an unexpected demonic armaggedon, can we call Pope Benedict XVI out of retirement to lead the faithful into holy war? Ignoring the fact that it's kind of illogical already to be able to hand in your resignation from being the earthly voice of god, I'm curious about the Pope Emergency issue. Hopefully we can still rely on Ratzinger to come to our aid in times of Biblical disaster.

Back to D&G: this show was so luxuriously detailed that it looked more like Couture than Ready To Wear. The embroidery and beadwork was inspired by Catholic art such as the Byzantine mosaics in the cathedral at Monreale, although the focus was more often on D&G's home island of Sicily.

The aesthetic was a combination of celebrations of Catholic imagery, and outfits inspired by the red vestments of Cardinals. If anything, this show offered a classier view of the Catholic church than is currently being projected by the church itself, as the focus was purely on the beauty of its art rather than any deeper meaning.

The only real low point was the interlude of ten grey tweed outfits in the middle of the show. Why were these outfits even there? They were certainly more traditional for Fall/Winter RTW styles, but the transition from the red and gold luxury of the Vatican to old-fashioned grey tweed seemed needlessly abrupt.

The shoes were a major highlight, with their intricate gold designs fitting perfectly with the theme. Rumour has it that the Pope's red shoes used to be manufactured by Prada -- perhaps D&G are angling for a Papal endorsement?

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Threeasfour, Fall 2013: The 13th sign of the zodiac.

Thirteen outfits long, this collection was based on the signs of the Zodiac. Technically Ophiucus, the so-called thirteenth Zodiac sign, is actually a Zodiac constellation and therefore not directly connected to the exacting and fact-based science that is astrology, but whatevs. The combination of mysticism and stargazing made for an intriguing mix, resulting in some excellent sci-fi priestess outfits: one for each sign.

pics from Style.com

Sadly I couldn't work out which was which. The first was Ophiucus, but where did it go from there? Perhaps there's someone out there with some more astrology expertise who can help me out. But I don't think the designs are very literal. There certainly wasn't any single outfit out there that reminded me specifically of a bull, a ram, or a pair of twins.

New Age themes aside, this was an interesting and well-developed collection. Threeasfour tend to be a little eccentric anyway, but they're consistent in their eccentricities. Lots of asymmetrical tailoring and patterns made up of repeated circles, as seen in previous seasons.

One of my favourite aspects of this collection was the headwear, which was straight out of Gallifrey. Laser-cut (presumably?) from leather and what may have been cardboard, these crowns looked like clockwork or 3D renderings of mathematical diagrams.

We can only theorise who will actually end up wearing these designs. They'd make excellent costumes for a high-budget 1970s sci-fi movie, but sadly not many people in the real world actually dress like this. However, Threeasfour have successfully managed the weirdness of their brand for several years now, so I can only assume (and hope) that there are some people out there who are enthusiastically willing to spend $$$ on grey woollen chaps and wraparound Zodiac robes.

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A Youtube guide to New York Fashion Week.

Thanks to the snow storm that buried New York this weekend, watching Fashion Week from the comfort of your laptop is suddenly seeming a lot more appealing than being among the models and movie stars who have to freeze their extremities on the red carpet.

Not every Mercedes-Benz FashionWeek show is available online (this season, anyway), but there are still many to watch each day, including such big names as Vera Wang and Oscar de la Renta. If you don’t have time in your schedule for livestream viewings, we already have a few recommendations from the first couple of days of shows...

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Fall 2013 Menswear: Alexander McQueen.

Previously on Alexander McQueen.

The backdrop for this show was more like a movie set than a traditional catwalk, with models traveling between wood-panelled rooms that had the look and feel of vintage train compartments. But while the decor was old-fashioned, the clothes were all about extreme, disturbing smoothness. Every outfit focused in on classic tailoring (a nod to McQueen's recently-opened Savile Row menswear store), with an overtly creepy tinge thanks to the smooth, almost android-like appearance of the models. Some even wore transparent masks, giving their faces a glassily inhuman appearance to match the sculpted  Brylcreem hair.

pics from Style.com unless captioned otherwise.

These outfits are proof that it's entirely possible to make a supposedly sombre black pinstripe suit look loud and weird. McQueen wisely kept the tailoring slim and subtle while experimenting with pattern work, meaning that almost every suit was a recognisable one-off without looking too out-there. The main on-trend detail was the lack of tie, which in this instance actually worked quite well. First of all, a full suit, buttoned to the neck but without a necktie, is traditionally the outfit of nebbish weirdos -- which fits in perfectly with the unsettling, serial-killerish vibe of this collection. Secondly,  these suits are far more mature than the typical buttoned-to-the-collar shirt outfits we've been seeing on the catwalks (and on hipster guys. And Jonny Lee Miller's Sherlock Holmes.) for the past year or so.

There's a trick to wearing a collared shirt with no tie, and it's mostly to do with the shape and spread of the collar. As a rule, the distance between the points of the collar should correspond with the width of the tie, meaning that wider ties go with collars that spread out at a wider angle, and so on. If you think about it, this makes sense because the closer together the points of the collar, the less room there is for a tie. If you look at the shirts in this McQueen show, the collars are all long and thin, and point almost directly downwards. If you were to wear a tie with these shirts, there would barely be enough room for the knot.

Also, if you take a look at the outfits as a whole, there isn't really any "need" for a tie. Ties are an essentially functionless object, and these suits are already busy enough that they don't need to be accessorised. Either the gap between the collar and the top of the waistcoat/lapels is so small that the presence of a tie would make it seem cramped, or the collar itself serves the decorative purpose of a tie -- for example, the bright, contrasting red of the collar in the picture below.

Probably the two most old-school nods to Savile Row tailoring are the wide lapels (not usually seen with narrow-spread collars, since lapels also tend to correspond with the width of the tie) and pagoda shoulders. Pagoda shoulders take their name from the smooth, concave curve (like the roof of a pagoda!) formed by the peak at the edge of each shoulder, the best example in this post being the jacket pictured above.

The stained glass patterned outfits were undoubtedly the most modern in the collection, tying in with current womenswear trends for soft but brightly-patterned trouser suits.

The show closed with some of the most old-fashioned ensembles, taking inspiration from 19th-century smoking jackets, evening coats and velvet dressing gowns.

from here.

Previously on Fall 2013 Menswear: Dior Homme and the Illuminati.

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Fall 2013 Menswear: Dior Homme and the Illuminati.

This show was very important to me for two reasons:

1. Ferociously minimalist suits. 
2. Fucken ILLUMINATI, YOU GUYS:

Ferociously minimalist suits are a major area of interest to me. From what I've seen so far, the extremely pared-down, knife-smooth suit is a main fixture this season -- and before you point out that at least 50% of Menswear Fashion Week is always grey suits: yes. I know. I'm aware that this distinction isn't necessarily important to everyone, but I tend to home in on every infinitesimal alteration made to the overal generic suit pattern. And as for the whole Illuminati thing: read on.

pics from Style.com

For whatever reason, Illuminati-inspired triangles are everywhere at the moment. Look up "Illuminati" on Tumblr, and half the tag is full of hipster teens taking pictures of themselves making triangle symbols with their hands. Ke$ha's latest music video was a mess of triangle/Illuminati imagery. There is even a subReddit for triangle enthusiasts. Dior Homme has taken this idea to its cleanest, most formalised extreme, with a single geometric pattern emblazoned across the chest and arms of several outfits in this season's show.

Compared to the severity of the rest of this collection, the simple red or white lines of the triangle/circle pattern seemed almost garish. The pinstripes on Dior Homme's suits were so slim as to be practically invisible, and anything so ostentatious as a necktie was exchewed in favour of a tiny, airplane-seatbelt style buckle. Although there were relatively few alterations made to the classic menswear suit silhouette, the fabric, accessories (or lack thereof) and ultra-narrow cut made these outfits seem like a very distant relative to the suits one sees in everyday life.

The creases and pinstripes on these trousers will be the death of me. Truly, I overidentify way too much with the protagonists of Jon Armstrong's Grey, a cyberpunk/sci-fi novel about minmalist suit enthusiasts.

There was something almost inhuman about the cleanliness of this show. Even the models wearing warm-weather gear looked as if they might not have a natural pulse, or were crafted entirely from plastic. And as we'll see in future posts, this is actually a popular theme among several other Menswear Fashion Week shows this season.

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Menswear Fashion Week, Fall 2013: Agi & Sam, Astrid Anders, and Craig Green

All three of the following labels appeared in this year's MAN show, an initiative partly funded by Topman to help up-and-coming British menswear designers. I hadn't heard of any of them until today, but I expect at least one of them will make it big in the next couple of years. Perhaps I'm overthinking things, but it seemed to me like each of these three labels represented one of the tenets of Topman's success as an affordable fashion mainstay: Agi & Sam as the dapper traditionalists, Astrid Anderson for larger-than-life street style, and Craig Green representing the cutting-edge trend junkies.

Agi & Sam
Agi Mdumulla and Sam Cotton's ideal client is, apparently, Ace Ventura: Pet Detective. 

pics from Style.com

Their muse this season is Alexander George Thynn, seventh Marquess of Bath, which at first made me go "oh no" because shows inspired by British aristocrats are invariably dull and/or baffling. But then I googled Alexander George Thynn, and wow:

source

TOTALLY VALID CHOICE OF STYLE ICON. I'm now kind of disappointed the show doesn't look more like him, because he's clearly an incredible role model if you want to look like a walking stained-glass window and/or cartoon magician.

This collection combined three things I always like to see in men's runway fashion: good shoes, non-traditional models, and a decent grasp of how to use bright colours without making everyone look like a children's TV presenter. I don't think I'll ever be in favour of padded bodywarmers/gilets as fashion items -- especially when they're layered over a coat -- but the interesting mix of fabrics and patterns more than made up for that.

With some predictability, this next outfit was my favourite of the collection. The cut of the suit is sleek and dapper, and the studiously bland jacket balances out the loud patterns of the trousers and waistcoat. Also, this is a rare moment when I can get onboard with the trend of men buttoning their top buttons but not wearing a tie, because in this particular case another colour or print would have overloaded the overall look.

(N.B. I'm not sure if the garment between the jacket and the shirt is a waistcoat or not, as it appears to have sleeves that overshoot the cuffs of the jacket. Is this a second shirt, or is the yellow cuff just another part of the jacket made to match the waistcoat?)

Astrid Anderson
Cartoonish exaggeration is pretty much the only context in which I can muster any interest in sportswear. Astrid Anderson's designs, partially made from mink, are just about glam enough to make the grade -- particularly since they're paired with gold lipstick.

Craig Green
CLEARLY THE MOST IMPORTANT MOMENT OF MENSWEAR FASHION WEEK THUS FAR. Taking Derelicte to a whole new level.

I'm a-flutter with curiosity. Will Craig Green's burnt-out plank headpieces be available for purchase?? Are all of his models latter-day Dementors? Do they really represent a battle between good and evil, as represented by the dark and light sections of the runway show? All I know is, the inspiration for this show was: "SHADOW".

Actually, I almost feel like I have to defend this show. It's not uncommon for either menswear or womenswear collections to feature one "extreme" accessory like a mask or hat, but have the rest of the outfits look perfectly reasonable. Taken individually, most of Craig Green's designs have a definite appeal -- especially the patchy sweaters and striped trousers, which show signs of a particular talent for the kind of rugged texture-mixing designers like Yohji Yamamoto are famed for. Plus, I think this is the type of show that one must view as a single unit rather than a selection of possible outfits. Craig Green is in a near-unique position in that he's critically acclaimed (and well-funded) enough to present his first collection after graduation as an art-fashion show featuring both body-sculpture and wearable menswear styles. I'm certain that I'll have seen some pretty ridiculous shows by the time Menswear Fashion Week is through, but this wasn't one of them.

(That being said, I was not hugely surprised to learn that Craig Green worked with Walter Van Bierendonck while Green was still finishing his degree at Saint Martin's.)

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